Mid-year check-in: Transitions

On New Years Day, I was having a text conversation with an old friend, and he asked me what 2013 was going to be about for me.  I replied with this statement: "2013 is the year that I hold lots of babies, travel a lot to connect with friends and family, make some changes professionally, and fall in love."

I saved that text, and I refer back to it once in a while to check in with myself- am I spending my time and energy to accomplish those things?

My one New Year's Resolution I make each year is one I will make every year - to hold more babies.  Why?  Because there is nothing quite as joyful as snuggling up with a baby.  It is peace and love and joy in a tiny, perfect person.  And thankfully, my siblings and friends have had the good sense to provide me with several new babies, so I never have to go long without working on my resolution. 

Me and Sylvie- June 12, 2013

Travel has been big on the agenda this year - So far, we've spent time in Colorado, New Jersey, New York City, and Alaska, and there are still some trips to come.  We've been fortunate to connect in-person with friends and family, and have made some very special memories.  (Watch out for my AK pics- I'll get them up this week, I hope.)

Views from the plane - Alaska is breathtaking from everywhere.

 

Falling in love - meh.  Still working on that.  Actually, that's not even true- I'm not working at all on that.   But I am working on caring enough about it to actually work on it.  So that's something.  (Let it be said that I am rather lazy about this part of my life- I'd much rather spend my energy on other things than worry about my love life.  When it's supposed to happen, it will happen.  That's how it's always gone for me, and I'm trusting that it will continue to go that way.)
 
Making some changes professionally is something that I put some serious some effort into.  I have worked for my current department for more than 10 years, and I started to realize that, for a lot of reasons, it was time for a change.  I began paying attention to job openings at the University, and almost immediately, a perfect-for-me position showed up in a department I have already worked with extensively, with people I already know and respect.  I submitted my CV,  interviewed a couple of days later, and was offered the position.  The whole process was rather seamless - it just flowed.  I start that new job this coming Monday.

It's bittersweet, leaving a place I've worked for so long.  This is where I learned to really enjoy the process of scientific research.  This is where I turned book knowledge into real-life, hands on experience. This is where I have met so many amazing people, many I now count as dear friends.  This is the home of colleagues that supported me through a lot of ups and downs.  This is a place where I have always felt at home, and knew I was good at what I was doing, even when everything else in my world seemed shaky and insecure.  It was a hard decision to move on, but ultimately, it is a move I need to make.  I'm excited to take on some new challenges, and for the opportunity for personal and professional growth my new job will bring.  If you are interested, my new job is the senior research manager at UPIQ. 

So there you have it - a mid-year check in on where I am with my goals for 2013.  Overall, I'd say things are moving along just swimmingly.

So far, 2013 has not just met and surpassed my expectations.

So far, it's been a kick-ass year!

Good Enough

*hanging out on my roof*

One of my intentions for this year was to create some s-p-a-c-e in my life. Space to play, to spend time with loved ones, to explore new places, to do the things that make me feel whole and complete. Between work, raising a child, and trying to take care of myself, I have a crammed-full life, and yet I have a mind and heart that need a lot of space and time to stay balanced. I simply was not getting that space or time, and it was causing a little bit (ok, a lot) of emotional upheaval.

Lately, though I've noticed just how much space has opened up in my life. It's not that I'm any less busy, or have any fewer obligations. In fact, things have ramped up a bit. My daughter doesn't spend much time with her Dad these days due to his schedule, thus limiting my own schedule, my work is busier than ever, I spend quite a bit of time with friends and family, and I'm actively working on developing new talents and hobbies.

Despite this, I have found that the space I needed has, indeed, opened up, and I can attribute it to some well-considered processes. After spending time making sure that I was solid on what my priorities were, I made three very intentional and much needed changes in how I live my life.

-I spent some serious time, energy, and elbow grease getting organized and on top of things around my house (stuff like decluttering, meal planning, budgeting,etc.) This keeps me from feeling like I'm always playing catch up with housework and grocery shopping and the minutiae of daily life. I thrive on structure, and this type of planning creates inordinate amount of breathing room for me.

- I started saying no to everything that wasn't an absolute YES. I used to think that I should attend every book club to which i was invited, go to every concert that sounded fun, and train for every race or event that came my way. I've realized that I just can't maintain this type of pace, so now I opt out of everything that doesn't just scream my name.

-Finally, I've really worked on adopting the "good enough" approach to life. This is hard for the type A perfectionist in me, but I'm getting better and better at knowing when "good enough" is, indeed, "good enough". (I think that this one thing alone has been the most important change I've made.)

So yeah...I've done exactly one triathlon and no century rides this year. But I've spent several evenings walking around my neighborhood with Riley, enjoying the lovely scenery and people that abound. I still try to eat a very healthy diet, but I plan super simple meals for most evenings and get my foodie fixes on the weekends when I can enjoy the process of cooking healthy, yummy meals. I get plenty of exercise, but if I don't feel like going on a hard run or killer ride, I don't force it. Instead I take a long, rambling walk or do some yoga. I go to bed when I'm tired instead of trying to finish up that 'one last thing'. I put in a solid day at work and then I shut it off and leave it there.

This type of living is not something you achieve and boom! You're done! Like everything else, it's a continual process and it's never going to be perfect. Sure, it often seems like I could be doing more, and in some cases, I wish I could, but right now, life has slowed down to a very enjoyable pace and I'm savoring it. I'm enjoying the evenings spent on the roof, the books I wouldn't normally have time to read and the time I get to watch my daughter learn and grow. These changes are giving me a lot of space and breathing room, and bringing with them a lot of peace and happiness.

My life these days - - it's really, REALLY good.

New Year's Intentions

I still haven't completely chosen my word for the year, but I'm not really that worried about it yet. This is something I've done religiously for the past several years, so it's on my mind a lot, but I'm not rushing it. The right word will find me when it's time, and in the meantime, I'm focusing on my New Year's Intentions.

"Resolution" is such a concrete, hard and fast word, and while the type A, perfectionist in me loves the idea of setting resolutions, the realistic part of me knows that life sometimes (often) intervenes and that I'll be disappointed in myself if I don't keep my resolutions. I know this about myself, so I only set one "New Year's Resolution" every year: to hold lots of babies. Holding babies makes me happy, so I am sure to keep this one. Ta-Da! Easy, no? (so easy and so successful that it's been my resolution every year for about three years. )

What I do instead is set some intentions for myself each year. These are, basically, things I want to see happen, projects I want to complete, trips I want to take--those types of things. I feel like this allows me to approach my life with a desire to consistently and conciously improve, but not from a place of scarcity. (Does that make sense?) I already have everything I need to be happy. The idea of setting intentions is to direct my energy towards those things that add richness and zest to an already wonderful life. The other thing I like about intentions is that working towards goals in this manner directs the focus on the process and the reasons, rather than the outcome or results. A much healthier mindset for me to embrace (thank you, Jen McGown, for this interpretation of intentions. you said it perfectly and helped inspire this post.)

So, the intentions for 2011 are:

To 'put first things first'. Defining my priorities is important to me, and I am constantly asking myself if I'm spending my time (and money and energy) on what really matters.

To focus on healthy living. I try to keep an emphasis on getting enough rest, eating healthy, whole foods and getting plenty of exercise. These things keep me sane, and if they aren't a huge part of each decision I make, they often get left behind.

To find S-P-A-C-E. During the past year, but especially during the past few months, I've felt totally overwhelmed by the sheer amount of commitments that I have. So much so that the idea of a couple of hours without something scheduled makes me giddy. Feeling this obligated makes me really anxious, because one thing I know about myself is that I need time to myself to recharge and re-balance. So I'm setting the intention that I'll open up more space in my life to enjoy my days. To do what I love, and not what I think I should do. To spend time with people I really enjoy rather than those I feel like I need to see. To play. To travel with my girl. To rest.

I'm feeling good about these intentions, and believe they'll help me move in the directions I am seeking for myself and my kiddo. Keeping it short and simple works for me.