Lessons learned from 35

It always happens in September.  The leaves change, the kids go back to school, and I add another spin around the sun to my age.  Fall makes me contemplative, and my birthday seems to make me even more so as I get older.  Lately, I've been reflecting on what I've learned from the past year.  What I want to keep with me as I move into the next year and what needs to go. 

This past year has been a little sleepy in some ways, but has also contained some really big, really important days.  There have been moments that have been game-changers, that altered the course of every part of my life, and there have been a thousand more that simply coasted on the energy created from daily living.   I've made a few big scary leaps into new areas of my life, and I've shuffled my way, slowly and cautiously, towards others.   Such is the way of life, I guess, and as long as I keep moving forward, I'm good.

Still, there are a few ideas I've really had hammered into me this year, lessons I've learned over and over again in various forms and through various means.  And a different lesson I learned a while ago is that when things keeps showing up, it's probably a good idea to pay attention.  So- the lessons that kept showing up this past year - here goes:


**Simply put, I must avoid the drama queens.  Although my caretaker tendencies urge me to jump in and fix/help/comfort/problem solve,  I am SO MUCH happier and balanced when I listen to my gut, cut and run.

**Although it might cost me treasured friendships, although it might make me rather unpopular in some circles, I will never regret telling my truth.  Never.

**My priorities are just that - MINE.  They don't need to fall in line with anything other than what I need and want and I don't need to justify or explain them. 

**It's worth mourning relationships as a way to bring closure, but it's not worth living in the "what ifs" and "whys."  It's just not. 

**It's ok to be incredibly grateful for all that I have, for all the abundance in my life and to still ache for the few things my whole soul desires.  The dichotomy is natural and good, and the longer and stronger the aches burn, the more effectively they function as a refiner's fire.  I know what it is I want. 

**Good things come to those who wait -  Good things come to those who work and strive and plan and keep trying.  (I stole this from Pinterest, but it's so very true.)

Pretty simple, right? 

Yeah-it seems that way - even to me - but those lessons have been hard earned, paid for with work and sweat and grace and faith. This past year required a lot of me - it forced me to define who I am, what I believe and what I want for my life.  It wasn't easy, but it's been good.   Real and good.

photo by Amy Gretchen.  I love how she sees the world.

And now- onwards and upwards, right? 

36 is waiting and I still have a lot of living (and loving and learning) to do.